Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Randomize
