god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
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