I wish I could teleport
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
