There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
