we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
