If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
