census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
