Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
