Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize
