when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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