i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Randomize
