bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
