i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Randomize
