i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I AM VODKA MAN
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
