I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
