Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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