i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
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