everyone is single if you try hard enough
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
