You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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