just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
