ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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