You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
