she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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