life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
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