as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
