I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize