Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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