scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize