he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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