Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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