I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
