Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
do nipples grow back?
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