I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
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