Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
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