So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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