Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
I'm having to shit out rocks
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
