And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
