He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
