I love black thongs
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
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