had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Randomize
