you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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