after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
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