So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
