I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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