I'll bet she douches with gravy.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
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