I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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