I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Randomize
