what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
