You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
