We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
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