I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
