Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Randomize
