Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
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